Close to 650 people poured into the Maryland Theatre last week to participate in “Balance: Striving for Progress for Families & Communities” the eighth annual community training held by Bester Community of Hope, a San Mar initiative. The event continues to draw national speakers focused on cross sector collaboration and reviewing strategies to address the expressed needs of children, families, and communities.
San Mar CEO Keith Fanjoy, LCSW-C, kicked off the day with a call to action to the community to take larger strides toward the types of structures and supports that children and families are asking for every day. Illustrating the upstream parable “the river story” Fanjoy shared that, “It’s not an either/or circumstance, it is a both/and need in human services. While we have taken many upstream steps and good efforts as a society, it’s not enough. The universal and common-sense truths of what needs to be done in our communities have been known for generations, why are we still saying them as opposed to investing and implementing the supports that families are asking for to scale? What will it take?” As a part of recognizing those who have been steadfast in their efforts in prevention and system change for a generation, San Mar Family & Community Services recognized long-time collaborator and supporter Paul DiLorenzo ACSW, MLSP, formerly of Casey Family Programs and currently a Senior Fellow of the Child Welfare League of America, with the Bruce T. Anderson Legacy Award. The recognition reflected his decade of diligently providing humble guidance and wisdom in the original launch of the Bester Community of Hope initiative.
The program began with Heather Forbes of the Beyond Consequences Institute, who laid a foundational philosophy on “The Language of Trauma” for community partners. Heather shared guiding principles in her research and models of service while giving practical examples of how to best interact with the most difficult youth. These ideas centered on reframing how we view individuals to build greater empathy and understanding. In addition, she brought various audience members to the stage with hilarious examples of how to come alongside “in the moment” problematic behavior, and respond to the needs of the three unique parts of the brain through “maximizing vs minimizing”. Forbes followed her keynote by spending the remainder of the day touring local schools and providing more specialized training with Washington County Public Schools leaders in partnership with South Hagerstown High School administrator Tim Morrow.
Next on the agenda was a dialogue between the President & CEO of Casey Family Programs, Dr. William C. Bell, and the U.S. Commissioner of the Administration on Children, Youth & Families regarding “The Future of Child Welfare”. The fireside chat format focused on the history of child welfare policy and the current ways government and community systems address the needs of families. Dr. Bell asked the audience to consider the question of what role the government has in raising children, “You are the answer that is in search of its question.” He added, “Most of us in this room would not turn to the government to raise our kids, it is the community. And a community of hope is a place where all five sectors come together to help the most vulnerable people in our community, and how do each of us own the responsibility for all of our children, not just the ones that are in my home.” Commissioner Jones Gaston shared, “Often times we start arguing about things that aren’t where our core shared beliefs are, which is we want kids to be okay. And again, if we want kids to be okay, their families have to be okay, and their communities have to be okay. The ability to make these changes requires not just us at the federal level to change our thinking and what we believe is possible, it happens at the state level, but it really is you all at the community level that are the drivers of changing the system.” Both guided the audience towards courageous action towards well-being versus welfare and ending family separation by lifting the voices of those most impacted by the system.
Washington County Department of Human Services Director Tiffany Rexrode LCSW-C introduced longtime collaborator Amelia Franck Meyer by sharing in Washington County we have “a bias towards action”. Franck Meyer took the audience on a journey of system change, and shared, “It doesn’t take a lot of bravery to stay [the system is] broken. It doesn’t take a lot of innovation or ingenuity to say it’s broken. But what are we going to do differently? How are we going to do it differently?” She provided a variety of examples and research highlighting progress and lifted the voices of lived experience as the key to future innovation, and shared the message they ultimately recommended, “Please don’t build a better child welfare system, because in fact the perfect child welfare system exists already, and it’s called the family.”
The day closed out with nationally recognized author of “A Child Called It” Dave Pelzer who provided a charismatic talk sharing “it is always about resilience” as he reflected on the horrendous early childhood abuse he endured. He focused his discussion on the circumstances and the helpers that made a difference in these extreme situations, and shared that a key social worker told him in a time of crisis, “There is nothing you can tell me that will make you love me any less. My love is unconditional.” As he transitioned to a foster home, he we told, “If you can survive all that you did without any help and without any training, I expect nothing but greatness from you now.”
This program led by the Bester Community of Hope initiative was made possible by an ongoing partnership with multiple community stakeholders, and lead support from the Washington County Department of Human Services and the Alice Virginia and David W. Fletcher Foundation. To learn more about the work of Bester Community of Hope, visit www.besterhope.org.
